“The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.
Don’t go back to sleep.
You must ask for what you really want.
Don’t go back to sleep.
People are going back and forth across the doorsill
where the two worlds touch.
The door is round and open.
Don’t go back to sleep.”
(From Love Poems from God by Daniel Ladinksy and quoted in Writing Down Your Soul on p 221.)
The door is round and open. How’s that for a simple truth. But what do we do? Why, we fall crashing into the sleep of the unconscious life and then whine and complain about how hard life is, how unfulfilled we feel, how disconnected, how lonely, how sad. We complain that we don’t get what we want–what we so clearly deserve.
But is that the door’s fault? No. The door to the inner world is open. The door to your soul is round. The door to the inside journey, the door to real human and spiritual connection, the door to peace, the door to fulfillment, the door to deep inner joy is open. So who’s got a problem here? Why, we do.
So, in your December Plan, as you are reviewing your year to date, uncovering all its gifts, ask yourself: When was I wide awake this past year? When was I aware of what was happening? When was I in touch with my soul’s purpose? When was I connected with my best self, my God-self, my fullest expression. When did I walk through that door and touch what’s real, what’s true, what’s holy?
And when did I look the other way? When did I stay so busy busy busy that I stayed oblivious of what I was feeling deep inside? When did I avoid real conversations–with myself, with my soul, with my source? When did I pretend I didn’t feel the pain? Didn’t see the dishonesty–mine or others’? When did I pretend to myself that everything was OK, when everything wasn’t OK?
In Rumi’s words, when did I go back to sleep? Back to the old habits, the old fears, the old assumptions?
Look at your year for a pattern of waking and sleeping. When you get your arms around what keeps you alive and what sends you reeling backward into sleep-walking through life, you’ll know something big about yourself. You’ll know something that could make a profound difference in 2010. Want a magical new year? You can have one, but magic comes to those awake enough to see it happening.
So here are a few questions for your deep soul writing on Day 11 of your December Plan. Plunge into these and your eyes will be knocked wide open:
How often was I asleep in 2009?
What are my sleep triggers?
What kind of situations or people make me want to go back to sleep?
What happened to awaken me?
What were my most awake moments? What kinds of situations or people make my soul sing?
How did it feel to be awake, really really awake?
How awake do I want to be in 2010?
How am I going to stay awake in 2010?
What do I think could happen, if I lived a more soul-ful, living, vibrant, awake life?
It’s an exciting vision, isn’t it?